Battlebard!

Discordette

Sometimes I really need to have a little faith.

The other night, I asked Slvr, “Do I want to work on sagas with Even, or take Dissy into Thunderholme and get her killed?”

Slvr generally knows what I want better than I do, so when he told me to take Dissy to Thunderholme, I logged her in (although I lamented to him on AIM, “But she’s gonna DIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEE!”, to which he replied, “I have faith in her!”).

I wasn’t optimistic – my level 26 gimpish first-life Drow bard, alone in a level 29 wilderness? Well, not QUITE alone; she grabbed the level 24 rogue hire because I didn’t know how hard the traps would hit her, and she ended up bringing her owlbear as well to keep aggro off the rogue while he disabled.

Dissy’s intentionally built more as a support toon than as a soloer. She has yet to earn a single XP in any destiny other than Fatesinger, mostly because I’ve just never felt like farming destinies on her. So she has no handy twists, or even fate points with which to twist anything.

But her Fascinate worked surprisingly well against the undead in Thunderholme, while her Song of Capering and Otto’s kept the Cult of the Dragon necromancers from being able to do anything except dance. Even the rare encounters – she got something like eight of them – didn’t give her much trouble. The biggest problem she had was completely breaking her Elyd Edge on the battleragers (’cause I forgot to grab her a Mutineer’s Blade from the shared bank) and having to turn to her Mad Lute.

I’d only been planning to take her as far as Dagan to flag her for Fire on Thunder Peak, but I’d gotten pretty far through the levels when I realized I’d gone the wrong way (me, lost? NEVER!) and was actually headed for *gulp* Sarva.

I wasn’t too worried about Dissy’s ability to take out Dagan. But Sarva… Sarva and her minions are another story. So when I finally reached the very bottom of Thunderholme and saw her standing there in the center, I decided my best option was to park the rogue and owlbear by the shrine, invis Dissy, and sneak over to get the journal.

Oops. I must’ve double-clicked when I told the owlbear to stay put, because he followed Dissy in, and of course Sarva saw him. Uh-oh.

I summoned the rogue, had Dissy play Sustaining Song, and buffed as fast as I could. Then I started spamming Dirge and sonic spells interspersed with Siren’s Song.

It got pretty ugly. I had to rez the owlbear several times, and the rogue once or twice as well. And Dissy came scarily close to dying herself more than once.

But Sarva’s red bar dropped to a sliver and then poof! she was dead, thanks to Siren’s Song going off at a VERY opportune time. Dissy and her hires took out Sarva’s minions, looted, and recalled, because by that point nearly all her gear was in serious need of repair (plus it was around 6 am and I kinda wanted sleep).

After facing Sarva, taking out Dagan the next night was a piece of cake. So my gimpy little bard is flagged for both dragon raids, where I have no doubt she’ll die frequently and ignominiously… well, almost no doubt. After all, I didn’t think she even stood a chance against the ordinary mobs in Thunderholme, let alone Sarva and Dagan.

So look out, Aurgloroasa, Nevalarich, and Tharaxata. Dissy’s coming for you!

Filkin’ around: Nerf City

Seregeth

Mostly I’m pretty happy with how my toons have turned out since Update 19, and aside from TRing Char, which had nothing to do with the update, I haven’t reincarnated – lesser, greater, or true – any of ’em. But there are still little things I run across that make me wonder what in the world the devs were thinking. After watching Slvr’s bard Dirge the training dummy multiple times tonight while he kept swapping gear around to figure out why there was no Harmonic Resonance going on, the phrase “Nerf City” popped into my head… and well, when that happens, most of my friends know there’s a filk on the way.

Jan and Dean, sorry to butcher your classic “Surf City” with my DDO version.

Nerf City

Too bad, delete, reroll

I got a level 20 tempest and she used to be bad-ass
(Nerf City, now I’m gimped)
She could’ve used some hit points but she beat up the mobs fast
(Nerf City, now I’m gimped)
But they forgot dual-wielders in the last update
So now all she’s good for is just dragon bait

Well, we’re stuck in Nerf City and we’re feelin’ dumb
Yeah, we’re stuck in Nerf City and it ain’t no fun
Well, we’re stuck in Nerf City and we’re feelin’ dumb
Yeah, we’re stuck in Nerf City and it ain’t no fun

Too bad, delete, reroll

I could TR her to a wizard or I could try out arti
(Nerf City, now I’m gimped)
I gotta figure out a new build or get left out of parties
(Nerf City, now I’m gimped)
Her skill points are a mess, they almost make me laugh
Do I really need to dump her bluff to raise spellcraft?

Well, we’re stuck in Nerf City and we’re feelin’ dumb
Yeah, we’re stuck in Nerf City and it ain’t no fun
Well, we’re stuck in Nerf City and we’re feelin’ dumb
Yeah, we’re stuck in Nerf City and it ain’t no fun

Too bad, delete, reroll

My monk can’t rez her hireling with Rise of the Phoenix
(Nerf City, now I’m gimped)
They say it’s working as intended but it seems more like a glitch
(Nerf City, now I’m gimped)
My rogue can’t find the secret doors around Wheloon
And my sorc’s DCs are crap, guess he’ll be my bank toon

Well, we’re stuck in Nerf City and we’re feelin’ dumb
Yeah, we’re stuck in Nerf City and it ain’t no fun
Well, we’re stuck in Nerf City and we’re feelin’ dumb
Yeah, we’re stuck in Nerf City and it ain’t no fun

Too bad, delete, re –
Too bad, delete, reroll